Need to attract attention: What does it respond to?

It is very common to hear that this or that person "wants to attract attention." Sometimes it is taken as a justification to belittle what that person manifests. However, it is necessary to investigate in greater depth the determinants and the differences that can be found in this type of behavior.

In the first place, we can think that all people can go through moments in which they are in a position to demand attention from others. The vast majority of people need to feel loved, valued, and recognized, and the call for attention can be a request in this direction.

In this way, we can think that this is not considered a problem in itself. The issue is when this demand is very recurrent and, somehow or another, the person cannot stop doing it.

In many cases, then, the call for attention is associated with a request for recognition and a constant need for external validation.

Thus, the intention is to appear in the foreground or develop behavior that does not go unnoticed and that implies that others intervene, either recognizing or valuing the person in question, or setting limits and worrying about them.

The need to be the center of attention constantly can correspond, in turn, to narcissistic tendencies. That is a high quota of energy directed towards the person himself. In these cases, there is great difficulty in attending to the affairs of others, and a constant focus on one's own issues, frequently having manipulative characteristics: using others in order to get something for themselves.

In many cases, a feeling of vulnerability or abandonment can also occur when the focus of interest moves to another person or subject. So you try to get that attention back in every possible way.

They can present themselves as excessively dramatic, histrionic, sociable people with intense social life. Outwardly they usually see themselves with high self-esteem, but deep down it is not because they require constant external validation to feel good about themselves.

“Actings” are frequently observed, behaviors that are a call to the other. Staging, dramatizations that have the objective of generating an impact on those around them that stimulates them to focus on them permanently.

One of the conflicts regarding this type of conduct is that it is usually considered voluntary. That is, as was the case a long time ago with the symptoms of Hysteria, they were considered to be "invented" by the person. This leads to a lot of judging of the subject and prevents them from seeking therapeutic help when it is necessary, although in most cases of this type consultations are not frequent.

It is important to keep in mind that in most cases it is not something that the person does "on purpose" but rather responds to a specific need. This, of course, does not mean that many of his actions may be problematic, but they must be observed in a multifactorial manner.

In many cases, this need for attention and recognition suggests a lack of attention or emotional support in childhood or in the first bonds, although this is not necessarily the case in all cases. The person may have had difficulty internalizing validation and recognition, resulting in a need to continue looking for it in the people around them.

 

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