Avoidance as a defense mechanism.

Avoidance as a defense mechanism.
Posted on 20-03-2022

Avoidance is a defense mechanism that is extremely common. It consists, as its name indicates, in avoiding, turning one's back, or fleeing from problems or unpleasant situations.

This defensive mechanism originally fulfilled an adaptive function. Animals avoid what could put them in danger. However, this mechanism in humans applies to situations where, in most cases, there is no significant risk.

Avoidance then becomes a means of escaping from reality, avoiding and losing contact with what is presented. Sometimes in a conversation, we can notice it, when the person literally acts ignoring the topic in question, changing it, or carrying out some task that allows him not to have to respond to it.

In many other contexts, avoidance comes into play when faced with a problem, the person does not seem to react and ends up running away, unable to deal with the situation or doing a whole series of parallel actions that do not solve the problem in question.

In an even clearer way, it is observed, for example, in those who agree on an appointment and then do not attend. Here it is very evident because the person is even avoiding the situation of saying that she does not want to or cannot go, simply to avoid a possible conflict. He usually says yes to everything that is proposed to him but then he cannot fulfill it.

Avoidance can manifest itself in these specific issues or it can have a greater scope, leading the person to shut himself in more and more, framed in a phobic framework, avoiding meeting other people or going out for fear of having to face danger. or problem.

The great challenge for those who frequently protect themselves through this mechanism is precisely being able to take charge and face the problems that arise. There is a certain magical concept in the unconscious of this modality, which is to believe that we can truly live a reality without conflict. Something like when we were boys or girls and we closed our eyes thinking we were not being seen. As much as we want to evade and escape, eventually, we will have to face something problematic and unpleasant.

Avoidance as a mechanism also tends to gain more and more ground. The more we avoid and withdraw, the more we feel vulnerable, so the more we need to keep withdrawing. Thus, many times a fence or barrier is created between the person and the reality that surrounds him, with increasing distance and preventing him from getting involved and committing to activities and tasks in his life.

It is complex when a person frequently puts this mechanism into play in a relationship because they cannot work together to resolve what is presented. One of the people is exiled, so there is no possibility to discuss and agree.

Working on this within the framework of therapy can help prevent this mechanism from being activated so often and the person can connect with the problems in another way. Have more active participation in what happens to you.

 

Thank You